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Scroll down to find out all about my adoption storybook “The Family Fairies” – Purchase a copy here
About Me
My name is Rosemary Lucas and I’m the very proud mother of two wonderful adopted children. They are not birth siblings and were adopted separately, but they are brother and sister in every possible way.
The word ‘mummy’ was something I never thought I’d hear. After a long and winding road full of twists and turns no one could have foretold, my dreams finally came true through the wonder of adoption. I am a firm advocate of adoption and want to be a voice for the reality of what it’s really like – the good bits and the challenges. There are lots of both. I am respectful of birth families and believe in sharing a child’s history with them. Keeping alive whatever has made them who they are. From the very beginning.
I’m keen to share what I’d like to have known before I started our adoption journey, as well as some of the considerations and practicalities we experienced during the adoption process itself. You might be considering adoption, have just started the process, or are lucky enough to already have your own adoptive family. You may be reading this as a friend or colleague might be embarking on their adoption journeys. Or, you may just be reading it out of interest. Whichever it is, I hope you find my website useful.
The content is just my own thoughts and feelings. I’m not a professional in adoption. I’m not affiliated to any organisations or benefiting from mentioning any. I’m just a mum who happened to have her children through adoption and who thinks it might be quite nice to share our story to support others. Check out my Blogs to see how it all began for us and the journey we took. I’m also very proud to be trusted to share the stories of fellow adopters and adoption professionals too. You can find a range of insights in my Guest Blogs.
The Family Fairies
I always wanted to be open and honest about how we came to be a family, but never quite found a children’s storybook that helped to explain the adoption process itself – so I decided to write my own! It was published in January 2019 and “Rosemary Lucas Storytime” was created to open up my support channels for fellow adoptive families.
When my daughter was young, I started making up rhymes to help explain the maze that is adoption. I wanted to do it in a way that would engage her and help lay the foundations of our family make up. So, I created the phrase ‘Family Fairies’ when referring to social workers and foster carers. As the years went by, I developed the story in my mind until I had the confidence to put it down on paper.
It made perfect sense to call my debut book ‘The Family Fairies’. It talks about the how, not the why, in a magical rhyming story. It gently references key stages of the adoption process in a positive and child friendly way, helped with the use of bright, vibrant illustrations. In fact, all the pictures you’ll see throughout the website are taken directly from the book. Overall, it emphasises how wonderful it is when a forever family comes together in this way – and how normal it is.
It was very important to me that social workers and foster carers were recognised for the tireless work they do in bringing families together. Finding safe, secure and loving forever homes for children that need it the most. A fellow adoptive mum once said to me “without them there is no us”. I’ve always held this very close to my heart.
I hope you can use my book with your little ones to show them the special journey you took to make your own dreams come true.
Adopting an Older Child
“As young as possible please”. The exact words I remember saying during our adoption assessments. Like we were putting in an order. It sounds ridiculous now. And very short sighted. But at the time after spending 10 years trying for children, I could only see myself with a baby. The truth was, we were very… Continue reading Adopting an Older Child
Through an Adoptees Lens
One thing that surprises me about our adoption journey is how much I am still learning nearly 10 years on. How much I still don’t know. And need to keep learning. It is safe to say there will always be things that come up that I need to think through. Research. What I had never… Continue reading Through an Adoptees Lens
Car Chats – The Big Questions
Where do your big life questions take place? Because they will be asked. We can’t avoid them. And we shouldn’t. But they do have a habit of coming our way when we least expect them. It is so true that children often have no filter. That generally they say what’s on their mind. Of course,… Continue reading Car Chats – The Big Questions
Adopting With a Troubled Past
There are many myths when it comes to adoption. People often question if they can become an adoptive parent. If it’s even worth registering an interest and applying. Perhaps thinking they have insufficient financial stability, are too old, have health concerns. That being single or not owning their own home would be seen negatively. All… Continue reading Adopting With a Troubled Past
An Age of Reflection
I’m not one to dwell on the past. Fortunate I can seemingly move on with little effect. But as I get older, I’ve become more reflective. My mind drifts far more to the “what ifs” and the “whys”. Recent challenging events are certainly driving this thought process. I find myself having to pull back from… Continue reading An Age of Reflection
Children’s Adoption Book Reviews
A lovely selection of reviews has been put together by Kerrie from @kezzabods (Instagram) who is a real advocate of reading to children. Here are some of her favourites that can help support adopted children with understanding their life story: Love makes your baby’s brain bigger, and reading to your adopted child can help level… Continue reading Children’s Adoption Book Reviews
Time to Say Goodbye
There are some things I read that stop me in my tracks. Stark reminders of the complexities of adoption. I recently spotted a post on Instagram by a lady I really admire. Just a year after adopting her daughter, she welcomed her twin full birth siblings. She was sharing her experience of final contact… Continue reading Time to Say Goodbye
My Boy Meets his Birth Mum
There are few stories as powerful as this one. I have been privileged that Kerrie has allowed me through the wonder of blogs, to join her on the journey she has taken to meeting the women that made her a mum. If you haven’t already read it, I suggest before you go any further that… Continue reading My Boy Meets his Birth Mum
Forever Friends
I wonder what it is like for a friend supporting someone they love through an adoption journey. Especially if they become pregnant themselves. How must it feel to share with a friend who has just had another failed IVF, that you are pregnant? It was always hard to hear someone else’s happy news. I really… Continue reading Forever Friends
Mums the Word
To tell or not to tell. That is the question. This is probably one of the biggest dilemmas I’ve faced as an adoptive mum. Do I tell people that my children are adopted? Or not. Do I share how we became a family and the rocky road we took? Or not. The general consensus from… Continue reading Mums the Word
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